We can’t believe it’s been a year since John McCain’s death. Now, his widow, Cindy, has opened up with People in a new op-ed. In it, she speaks about how she’s pulling through.

“Our heaviest grief has subsided, which I’m sure would have prompted John to wisecrack, ‘It’s about time,'” she writes. “He could never stand still, and he didn’t want us to languish in our loss. Neither did he want us to mark the anniversary of his passing with solemn commemorations and tears, but to celebrate the life we shared with him.”

“It was a struggle at times to reach this point,” Cindy continued. “I was so accustomed to sharing life with John, there were days when I felt overwhelmed by his absence, and the habits and little problems of ordinary life seemed a challenge. But you learn it’s okay to not be okay every day. You learn to live with a broken heart, and the bad days become fewer, and the time in between richer and more meaningful.”

She added, “Being a mom helped. My children are adults, but they were hurting too, and being a trusted counselor and supportive presence to them is the most fulfilling purpose I have.”

Read more at People.