The best of us have embarrassing masturbation stories — including John Stamos! 

“This is an absolutely true story and I’ve been waiting to tell this story,” he tells Busy Philips on her new talk show Busy Tonight. 

“Trying to get pregnant and we had to do a thing, and we had to go to a fertility, ya know, place,” he said of he and his wife’s pregnancy journey. “And I had to go give a sperm sample. I can’t believe I’m finally getting to tell this story. And I went into this little room where they go, ‘Go in there…’ And they said, ‘If you need any stimulation or whatever there’s videos and there’s a TV here, just turn the thing.’”

Wait till you find out what that “thing” was. Watch below: