Lena Dunham opened up about her heartache following the split from Jack Antonoff, who she was with for five years.

“We sat in our shared kitchen of nearly four years and quietly faced each other, acknowledging what nobody wanted to say,” she wrote for Vogue. “That obsessive connection had turned to blind devotion, and the blinders were coming off to reveal that we had evolved separately (the least shocking reason of all and perhaps the most common).”

“For an exquisite moment, rather than mourn the loss of my partner, I mourned the loss of my bravery,” Dunham wrote. “I used to have no problem staring into the face of the hostess [in a restaurant] when I said, ‘Just one for dinner, thank you.’”

Read the rest at Vogue.